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Thursday, September 10, 2009

This is what Middle School looks like!



Its official I have a son in Jr High, a very handsome one at that. I picked him to blog about today because this boy amazes me with each new day. He looks so much like his father and obviously inherited his sports skills from him but he is so me when it comes to his heart. Well I cant really say all me when it comes to his heart because he did break up with his girlfriend via text which for the record I thought was a very jerky thing to do but granted he is only 11 years old. Anyway John and I have always spoiled this kid rotten, maybe because he was our first and he is a boy I have no idea but the kid is one lucky guy. We would often ask each other if maybe we have made things to easy for him, given him to much stuff, we famously say the line "when we were kids, we never got that" As parents I don't think you really know until they are older how well you have done instilling values in them. Lately I have been starting to see that he actually gets things. He feels sympathy and empathy which so many adult men often lack. We had to pick up a football friend that needed a ride last night. This boy looks like he has had a hard life, and may still be having a tough time, his neighbor hood is a bit rough and his parents are divorced, I wish I knew the whole story but I don't. Well we dropped him off to an empty house at 7:30 last night, he had a house key and we think his Mom was working, Tyler was a bit interested in why he was going home to be alone. Not knowing the true reason I said maybe it's because they don't have anyone else to take care of him at night, its probably their only option. After a bit of discussion we dropped it and this morning Tyler was getting ready and he mentioned to me about his friend, how much it bothered him. He said Mom I am so thankful that I have you and Dad and that he appreciates all that we do for him, and that he feels lucky. I wanted to cry, I feel like he does get it. After I had kids and the older I get the more I want them to know that life is not always fair, good people can be poor people, just because someone has a big beautiful home does not make them worth more that someone that lives in a shack. We all do it at some point in our lives we judge, I do, If I had my pick of a dirty kid and a clean kid to hug, I would pick the clean one. Which when you think about it, is not right or fair. Every kid deserves that hug. I work so hard at trying to get my kids to fit in, I sometimes forget the moral of the story. Its not about what you have its about who you are. The same can be applied to my life, friendships should not be about who you are or what your status is, it should be about who we really are deep inside, and having sympathy and empathy for one another. Its about being honest and not being afraid to show your own weaknesses. If you do have a friend like that consider yourself very lucky because they are very hard to come by. Tyler just started 6th grade, he has a long road ahead of him, many people will try and will crush his spirit, I just hope he always has the guts to be who he really is. I watch him with some of his friends that are not his football friends, he trys so hard to help them fit in. He really is a very nice boy with a great big kind heart, I just pray that he stays that way.

5 comments:

Lea said...

Oh Shelly - what a wonderful post! I hope that I too can raise boys with the success you have had with Ty. He is one HECK of a kid - a joker for sure, but a huge heart! You guys should be very proud parents to have a son like that!!

Lisa said...

I agree! This is a wonderful post dedicated to your boy Shelly!! It has just amazed me over the last few years watching Ty go from a great kid to a great young man. He is definitely following the great examples his parents set for him!!

Kristin said...

He is a great kid that has learned a lot from his parents. It is hard not to fall into "cool weaknesses" around you, to like people because they are good people not because of what they can offer you.
It is wonderful that Tyler appreciates the "small" things like great parents that love him:)!!!

Kristin said...

He is a great kid that has learned a lot from his parents. It is hard not to fall into "cool weaknesses" around you, to like people because they are good people not because of what they can offer you.
It is wonderful that Tyler appreciates the "small" things like great parents that love him:)!!!

Jodi said...

Junior High!! That's all I can say...almost like using this "place" as a state of mind instead of a noun. {or just as an excuse!} You are a great mom raising great kids. Keep THAT in the forefront of your mind. The rest will just come.